Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, if they get angry, they''ll be a mile away and barefoot.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
Always yield to temptation, because it may not pass your way again.
Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
Eat well - stay fit - die anyway.
Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
Middle age is when broadness of mind and narrowness of waist change places.
Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.