Foreword:
I like writing in English, but sometimes I find I really get little time to write on all that I want to write about. Maybe it’s just sort of an excuse, but I have no excuse not to reply to the letters from my friends. It then occurs to me that I can share all those letters to my friends here in this forum. As a rule, I write very long letters with all kinds of topics. I think you can clearly see what I’m thinking about through these letters, so I will make it a series of posts with the same title: “pieces of my mind via letters”. Hopefully you won’t feel bored with it, and your comments are welcome. Ok, the following letter is a reply to one of my best net-pals. He is now a junior majoring in English, but he doesn’t like English. He likes and is really good at Chinese writing. I also like writing in Chinese very much, and really appreciate his marvellous work. Therefore, we make good friends with each other, and often exchange ideas about it. We are like real sister and little brother. This January, right before I left for Sydney, I even met him in person in Nanjing when I visited my former classmates. I encouraged him to work hard in his study. Ok, so much for the background information and here is the letter I wrote to him, any feedback is expected and welcome:
2004-09-29Dear little brother,
I just want you to keep on writing to me in English for two reasons: first, you need practice, because your letter sounds really chinglish with grammatical mistakes as well. (I actually pointed all the mistakes for him, but here I just ommit it.)
Hopefully my directness won’t hurt your self-esteem, but it’s really nothing to be ashamed of. I mean to confess you are not good enough, and there’re still some problems with you. To be human, it’s common to be imperfect. Once you find a problem, you actually get an early chance to cope with it, and then solve it to improve yourself.
Now I never feel ashamed of being inferior to my classmates in this top university. Instead, I cherish the opportunity to learn together with them, those really very competent and successful persons all through the world.
Did you keep an eye on the Olympic Games last month? You know, I was so emotional about this event. For one thing, I’ve been abroad; my inner strong attachment to our own nation started to work and was overwhelming more than ever before. I felt so proud of the good performances of our sportspersons. For the other thing, I tend to better understand that for some of the sports which we are really weak in, to compete with the strong opponent itself is valuable, as you can truly learn from your opponent, from the competition. The point is if you put what you’ve learnt into practice and keep on practising hard, it will come your day and your moment sooner or later, as the saying goes: “Each dog has its own time.” Firm belief or say determination, and persistent endeavours, as I suppose, are the keys to success.
At the end of your letter, you also mentioned that next time, you would like to ask me for advice on how to improve your English study. I’ve actually offered you some sound advice above: foremost, be more careful the next time when you write in English. Then as far as the Chinglish is concerned, there’s really no other way, but keep on practising. You should stick to writing in English, as frequently as possible. You know what I mean?
Ok, now let’s come to the content of your letter. I spent my Mid-autumn day at peace. Yes, I went to the local community library as usual, doing some readings and taking notes too, and then returned home. On the way home along that quiet road, I talked to myself in English as usual. I often conduct such an oral diary to urge myself to speak in English. You know, I’m living and staying with Chinese most of the time, so I have to create some exercises to practise my English. Talking to myself in English and then listening to the radio (ABC news) when I go to bed or wake up early in the morning, these two are really what I like. I enjoy them, as I know I can make progress in my English from these experiences. I simply enjoy them. Have you paid attention to the specific word I used, I mean “enjoy”.
You’ve mentioned in your letter that you were interested in literature (I bet that’s the more precise thing you refer to, since you are passionate about Chinese writing), but you simply had no interest and were even “forced to” study English to meet your parents’ anticipation. I must say you are totally wrong. You needn’t be forced to do anything by anybody else, even you have to, you can still develop or say cultivate your interest in it.
Studying shouldn’t be such a suffering; rather it’s all about self-improvement, which you are looking forward to and really happy and comfortable with. I seemed to have told you before that when I was still a freshman, I was truly fed up with English learning. I hated reading books written all in English. Nevertheless, I simply wanted to go further with my English level after I got a satisfying mark in the TEM-4. Looking back these days, it’s not all by accident, as I had spent long hours in the language lab to listen to the tapes (Last time, I’ve suggested you to constantly visit it), and English chat room to “type” in English as well. What I did had helped me to go somewhere, and the further I go, the more interested I become.
Progress, in my eyes, is the best thing to cultivate your interest and then motivate you to work harder. Just think about it, there’s no absolute thing in this world. Everybody and everything is changing, to change is to grow, and to grow is to be happy. Enjoy the process of learning something and making progress. Your perception and attitude really determines and matters. That’s also why I suggested you to do some readings on psychology, as I’ve already been benefited so much from it.
You must be clear that I used to be so blue, especially when I failed in that cyber love. I was too lonely and helpless to be happy. He seemed have dominated my mental and spiritual world. I thought I simply lost everything when I lost him. That’s the problem. Your negative thinking directly leads to your disorder or say imbalance in mood. If you ask me again whether I’m lonely now, I will tell you with a firm and loud voice without hesitation that “No, definitely not!”
I’m calm and happy most of the time, even though I’ve been so far away from home, struggling against all kinds of difficulties and challenges abroad on my own. The secret is I’ve learnt how to better control my negative emotions, how to be master of my own emotions, since I’ve read so many guidelines on how to deal with those kinds of things. Everybody has some times in their lives with low spirit or negative emotions, but I’d like you to keep in mind that happiness is actually a choice; it lies in your own hand. You can simply choose to be happy or not. Nobody can make you unhappy if you don’t choose to be like that. I know you may argue that it’s much easier said than done, that’s why I suggest you to do some relevant readings, think about them, and find some rules that really fit you and then put them into practice in your own life. Trust me, it really works.
I take up so many hobbies now; the extensive interests in all kinds of things keep me busy with something all the time. I even don’t get much time to worry about other things, simply as I’m busy! Somebody has once said that there’re three ingredients of happiness: love, hope and getting something to do. Just think about it and be wise. Take interests in or say love things you are doing, and really enjoy them with the hope that you can make progress and fun with it, such as English study. I believe you will learn to be happy too.
Ok, I have to stop here. Don’t forget to write to me regularly, and I will always supervise on how well you’ve done as a real conscientious sister. Yes, to me, to be happy also means to help others, once you help others and make them happy, you are feeling good and happy as well. Happiness is such an impressive topic. But it’s already 1 o’ clock in the morning, and I’d like to talk with you more next time.
Wish you happy and make progress,
Yours sister, Joan
