When was the last time you realise that you are slightly different from how u know youself? When was the last time u realise you changed? When was the lastime, u found that you no longer like what u used to like, and infact u hate what u use to like, be it a person, an issue, a way you deal with things, a book u read, a song u listen to, or even a movie u watched..and the list go on.
And how would you react when you realise you changed? would you be terrified? would you be nervous? would you be ignorant and that you dont care you change? or you are so dumb that you dont even reaslise that u change?
how much does it take to make someone, someone nice, to become someone an agreesive, hostile and arrogant person?
Security Guard:" miss, you cant bring in the book. please leave it at our counter when you shop".
Lady:" why? why should i leave it there? I have receipt!" (in high pitch).
Security guard :"......."(Speechless, as he could have never expect a customer that refuse to do what he asked them to.
colleague:" this doesnt make sense, the entire procedure should reflect the real life situation, instead of following the system blindly".
Lady: "Are you trying to imply that i am doing my job blindly???"(in a very angry tone).
Colleague:" I dunno" (in stead of saying no. )
how much does it take to change an individual from a say-yes-to-all to a say-no and question why and ready to "protect the teritorry" person? how much pain it takes and how much wound it caused to one's heart and mind to make the person be so sensitive and hostile wanting to defend herself from anyone but herself. well, may b even herself.
was it the society that is so cruel, the corporate word that never tell you never signal when u can b backstab, or was it the hatred for the other country that one further study to and taken as never accepted by the other government just because the disqualification for PR application?
how would one feel, or should one feel ,when a colleague that have lunch with you everyday, complaining everyday about supervisors and colleague, and saying that she would be tendering soon, and even extend her invitation to you to tender together; ended up, handling the final two available files in the office to the internal control manager? what is she doing if in the first place she even refuse to have lunch with the ICM behaving that she dislike him that much. why would she wanna give him the files when she knows very well that other colleagues would be needing it too. how would you feel, or how should one react when the good mood, was totally destroyed by the above mentioned coleague by listening to her complaining everyday over lunch, and emotion gone down all the way to rock bottom and act hostiley to other collegues just simply because you have heard some bad news about the other colleague? shouldnt one distance herself from this colleague?
what good will it make despite reading books over lunch time and not joining the crowd/colleagus for lunch? hiding oneself behind books, among stories and characters, in order not to listen to all gossips made, all "bad experience" one had, and bad encounters ...but this doesnt help to develop one's social skills nor would it help solving the problem of cant help being provoked and get angry whenever oneself heard gossips.
when was the last time you ask urself, why did you do that? how would you classified and differentiate being too comfortable in the comfort zone, and taking too much of un-uncessarily risk and ended up ruinning everything? how could you justified who to trust and who not to? how should one react when hearing too much of a provoking gossips? how can one tell when he or she has been caring too much about others and should start caring herself/himself instead of others? when was the last time u are not willing to go to bed despite being exhausted, knowing the fact that u would have to face anotherday and new problems when you get up, or probably have to go to work when you wake up? when is the last time you still enjoy going out with ur family when they ask u to drive them around? have you ever felt that despite taking a day off from work and you thought u'd be enjoying some private time and space, all ur family members ended up asking you to drive them to different places, as if u take a day off just to be their chauffer? and as a result of that, you were so pissed that you felt as if everyone want a share of your life and u are annoyed and you feel like yelling at them to stop taking urlife from you?
when would someone know he/she has been complaining too much and not knowing they should treasure whatever they have right infront of them? when would one know, it is time for a therapy before things get worse? how would one know which therapy is good for them, as good one will ease the pain helping one to let go while bad encounter and experience will only provoke the more aggresive, angry, hatred part deep down?
what is the point of starting a relationship with a person when u know very well given the current condition, not only would u not able to influence him/her and bring th best out of him/her, you would instead provoke and bring the worst out of the person?
when is the last time u realise you changed? when is the last time u no longer is the person u thought u are or u wish you were? how do u react to that? did u care? or did u simply hide urself in books in order to runway from facts and truth?
when is the last time u changed so much that, u find urself unrecognisable?
personality revolution?
