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Never judge
来源：洪恩论坛 Canuck's Comments
日期：2005-12-13
作者：joan.blue
阅读：1170 次
The Bible tells us that "Never judge".
Nevertheless, I haven't come to realize it until I met something unusal yesterday.
I kept silent on the phone for nearly two minutes. I tried my best not to open my mouth and replied her even a single word. Two minutes could be short, but I felt it was so long and unbearable at that time.
The great warth was just burning violently in my heart. I felt it was the first
time in my life that I had chose to shut my mouth due to the overwheleming wrath
.
The person on the other side of the line was actually one of my friends.
We were highschool classmates, but seldom chatted at that time. Therefore, I didn't know her very well, so was she until I came to work in Peking early this April.
This big metropolis is after all entirely new to me, so I was happy to meet her
, and tried to keep contact with her in the coming 8 months.
Usually, we shared all the latest happenings on the phone, with both joy and sorrow.
Afterwards, she even helped to make a "blind date" for me. Her colleague was quite all right with his personality and background conditions, but I just found that I had no feeling of love about his face. After a month's dates, I decided to
break up with him.
This friend was not happy about this. She just kept saying that I was very much
the ignorant bear, always trying to pick the best corn in the field, only to result in getting nothing at the end.
At first, I thought she was just direct, though her words always sound so critical to me. The same goes with her repeatitive "sound reminder" that the certificate of overseas master degree that I achieved within a year was nothing, and I should never value it with high anticipation.
I have been sharing with her nearly all the details about my happy stories in my
current famous company. I told her honestly that if only had one of my parents'
friends in Peking made the recommendation for me before the interview, I would
have already lost the opportunity to get employed, for these job vacancies were
not open to the society.
Once for a while, she just remarked with admiration that "you are really such a
lucky dog to get such a good family to always support your dream, and also enable you to get the current good job with less difficulty compared with me and some
other ordinary university graduates." Everytime, I just smiled and admited this
.
Last month, I made an unforgettable mistake in my job, and was transferred into
a new department. What's worse, the company leader decided to postphone the time
to sign the following contract with me.
As a great setback in my life so far, I was truly under pressure. I shared with
her my worries on the phone again, but emphasized that I would try my best to get it through with harder work, since the company still offered me another period
of time to make compensation for the entire issue. She just said she was happy
to see that I managed to keep the right attitude.
Unlike my smooth life experiences, this friend of mine came from a single-parent
family. She just went to a private college, but still managed to come to peking
for post-graduate qualification examinations. Moved by her strong determination
, a very excellent postgraduate from the top TsingHua University became her cohibatant boyfriend, and had already bought themselves a new flat for marriage. However, this friend of mine failed the postgraduate qualification exam again not long ago, and decided to self-study at home again for the certificate of lawyer.
More than once, she complaint about her tedious study life at home, and her worry about living on her boyfriend's earnings. Yesterday, she even grunted on the phone that "I just found to live in Peking is too hard for me, I really wanted to
go back home."
"I never feel life in Peking is so hard, even I'm probably to lose my current job and get no boyfriend to settle down. We really need to be content with our life."
To my great surprise, she didn't appreciate my comfort at all, but replied in a
sacarstic tonge: "Don't tell me you are satisfied with your current life, you are just lying! "
Dispite my astonishment, she just went on her attacking words: "I've told you several times, don't be too picky about choosing your future boyfriend, but you didn't listen to me. The better your personal conditions became, the harder men will accept you as their girlfriend. "
"Hey, don't say like this, I just have the confidence in myself. If you are good
enough, your Mr. right will sooner get you." I replied.
She just burst into a cold laughter: "You are just living in fantasy all the time! How many graduates can be like you, get parents with 'social connection', and help you to the good job without trouble? "
I suddenly got angry as well, "'social connection'? Is it what you are talking about? do you think I get my current job just because of it? do you think the so-
called 'social connection' can help me win the other competitors in my job if I'
m such an incapable fool? "
"Capable? " She raised her ironical tone and laughed coldly again. "Look at the
mistake you made! You parents had helped you to pravell the way, but you failed
to jump at the opportunity!"
Like a sword into my heart, I suddenly found no voice to reply her. She just went on with her coldness speech:
"I can tell you that for graduates like me,we have to send our resumes over and
over again but get no interview at all! You don't deserve to say that we have to
be content with our current life...."
She went on and on, I simply forgot what exactly she was talking about. Wrath grew rapidly, I could no longer bear her condemn without pity.
What does she think she is? How does she know I'm not really self-satisfied with
the current situation even it's an adversity as I claim? How can she judge me like such a rubbish fool?
I didn't say anything for two minutes. She finally realized that she had talked
too much. "Of course, I know for a new worker, it's quite inevitable to make mistake, but...." she suddenly tried to say something soft, but I stopped her there
:
"Listen, I still get something to do, goodbye!"I was actually too exhausted to listen to any of her words.
I was extremely sad afterwards. She was judging me in such a distorted way, though she was even my friend!
Deep in thoughts, it occured to me vincent's words that people without sense of
humor are always judging the right humurous person by critisizing his taste.
I started to review my own fault in the past. He is correct. We may have different opinions about certain things, it's all right to get our own opinions, but it
's unfair to make the judgment on the people by his face.
The hobly Bible just tell us "Never judge." We should really think about this.
Joan writes on Decemeber 13th, 2005 in Office
