我常常会对着 human being这个词发呆, 准确地说,是”being” 这个字。这个字真好,现在进行时,being a human,,冷静、直白地把生命的短暂,时光的流逝坦荡地摆在人们的面前。
不知道这世上是否有灵魂,但细细想来,思想算不算人的灵魂?脱离肉体,沿着时间和空间的坐标轴无拘无束地漂荡,附着在每一个“有灵犀”的心里 – “灵魂附体”,或者说“思想重生”,这也许本来就是一回事。
“Rocky Mountain High”是我在中学就听过的乡村歌曲, 但直到最近,仔细体会了歌词的含义,才豁然了解到John Denver 那传奇的一生和“灵魂重生”的感觉。那隽永的文字给每颗渴求宁静的心“如沐春风”般的感受。
Rocky Mountain High
He was born in the summer of his 27th year
Comin' home to a place he'd never been before
He left yesterday behind him, you might say he was born again
You might say he found a key for every door
When he first came to the mountains his life was far away
On the road and hangin' by a song
But the string's already broken and he doesn't really care
It keeps changin' fast and it don't last for long
……
John Denver 1943年出生于New Mexico, 就是Colorado南边的那个州。从小热爱音乐,1971年,在他27岁的时候放弃了建筑学业,专心乡村歌曲的创作。
为何放弃学业?当时是怎样的所思所想?无从得知,我们还是从歌词中寻找答案吧。
“他诞生于27岁那年的夏天,来到了从未到过的家乡 ……”引人思索的哲理诗中,我看到了一个决绝地告别昨天,寻找内心安宁,回归精神故土的青年。
Denver之前的生活状态如何,几乎没有资料记载。但歌词中分明有着“On the road” -- “在路上”的“垮掉的一代”,应该就是他那“far away”的生活方式了吧?琴弦已断,“hanging by a song”的日子一去不返,又有什么值得永恒持久地追求呢?
…
But the Colorado rocky mountain high
I've seen it rainin' fire in the sky
The shadow from the starlight is softer than a lullaby
Rocky mountain high
Rocky mountain high
He climbed cathedral mountains, he saw silver clouds below
He saw everything as far as you can see
And they say that he got crazy once and he tried to touch the sun
And he lost a friend but kept his memory ……
“… Colorado rocky mountain high, I’ve seen it rainin’ fire in the sky…” 这就是我在犹他州驾车时的感觉啊! 穿行在科罗拉多火红的山脉之中,仿佛是落入了茫茫火焰山一般。”fire” 可以“raining in the sky”,“starlight”可以“softer than a lullaby”,这真真是“通感”修辞手法的绝妙运用。看到这样的诗句,你是否涌起了阵阵心浪呢?所谓艺术,可能指得就是这感同身受的美妙体验吧。
“touch the sun”算是“crazy”吗?也许吧,曾经看到一篇文章,说艺术家往往具备某些“精神病”的特质。不被世人所解,所以“疯狂”,只有自己听得到内心的呼声。我再次想起了李太白,那飘逸的文风和Denver有几分相似? -- “扪参历井仰肋息, 以手抚膺坐长叹”,一个“摸星宿”,一个“触太阳”,这样的“张狂”恐怕是要令人瞠目了。Denver出生的新墨西哥地处美国西南,借用中国“楚地”的标示吧,他真的有资格和李太白一并仰天长啸:“我本楚狂人……”
……
Now he walks in quiet solitude the forest and the streams
Seeking grace in every step he takes
His sight has turned inside himself to try and understand
The serenity of a clear blue mountain lake
And the Colorado rocky mountain high
I've seen it rainin' fire in the sky
You can talk to God and listen to the casual reply
Rocky mountain high
Rocky mountain high
Now his life is full of wonder but his heart still knows some fear
Of a simple thing he cannot comprehend
Why they try to tear the mountains down to bring in a couple more
More people, more scars upon the land
……
“Introspection”这个词的意思是“向内看”— 即“内省”。”His sight has turned inside himself to try and understand……”,所有的“灵魂重生”都伴随着“内省”的过程。不是吗?我们在宗教里会找到无数“冥想”和“顿悟”的佐证。
“我从何而来?”“这个世界是否有意义?”对这些问题的思索恐怕只能在 ”quiet solitude” 中,用内心的声音来询问 “mountain and lake”。过高的社会性往往阻碍了人们原始的思考,这也是深刻的思想者往往具有内向性格的原因。“内省”得越深入,创造性也越强。
”You can talk to God and listen to the casual reply….” 在科罗拉多山脉隐秘的湖水间,一个青年在自言自语地“天问”。会有答案吗? -- 有,你听,那山间的溪水,清脆的鸟鸣,松枝的断裂,和耳边的微风。
“…Why they try to tear the mountains down to bring in a couple more,
More people, more scars upon the land…”
“为什么要这样生活?”不能回答这个问题是我们现代人最大的悲哀。我们像是被巨浪裹携的一叶扁舟,来不及停留,也来不及思索,永远奔向巨大的未知。难道这就是我的生命吗?我真的很惶恐。 “The serenity of a clear blue mountain lake”,我希望自己的心就像山间蓝色的湖水,清澈的水面永远倒映着生命中传奇的云朵。
1997年10月12日,一架私人飞机坠落在美国西海岸的大洋中,人们甚至无法找到驾驶员完整的身体 --- John Denver 永远离开了我们,以特有的方式回到了自然母亲的怀抱。
“I know he'd be a poorer man if he never saw an eagle fly …”,像一只飞翔的雄鹰,他消逝在洛基山茫茫的山野之中。
“…
'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go…”
“Leaving On A Jet Plane”, 他的歌声神奇地印证了自己生命的终点。
每当“高高洛基山”那熟悉的吉他旋律铿锵响起,我都会报以会心的微笑。一路走好,我为你的重生而欣喜和自豪。
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