I was about to write something more than two weeks ago. Yet I was too sad to
write anything.
I wrote a post about two months, in which I mentioned one of my colleagues who had level cancer at that time. About two weeks ago, he passed away, aged only
36, after he had been in the hospital for one and a half months, leaving a ten-
year-old son.
Two days before his death, he himself felt that it wouldn’t be long for him
to be with family members, and it will the tenth birthday of his son, so he decided to give up being treated before his son’s birthday to go back to hold a birthday party for his son. Yet two days later, and just three days before that day, he left his family, and all of us.
After he left us, a note book was found by his son in his desk, and something in his heart was known to all of us, and shocked us so great.
He found himself terribly ill early in March this year. But he didn’t go to hospital at that time, because he has loaned to buy the house, and he borrowed
a lot of money from his relatives at the same time. He was worried that he would spend too much money if he went to hospital, and he didn’t want his wife and
his son to live a hard life, so he just looked up some materials that then bought some medicine from a medicine shop. After the medicine was bought, he tore the
mark on the medicine bottle away so that his family wouldn’t know the fact. We
could see no sign of sickness because he was always smiling to the colleagues.
And he worked as hard as before. On March the 31, he wrote his will, his dying words, which was later found after his death. In it, he listed out all his debt,
and he asked to sell his house to pay it back.
No one, even his family, knew his trouble, until he couldn’t persist any more and went to hospital till October. The teachers in our school donated about 20,000 yuan for him. But it can do nothing to help. It is said that the cancer was on
his rectum, but by October, when he was in hospital, the doctors found it had spreaded to his liver and lungs. So the only thing the doctors could do is to lengthen his life. But all these couldn’t do much to help, one and a half months later, all have come to an end. They all said that if he took an operation in March, he might live ten more years.
When I talked this case with my friends, the first question they asked was,
“Was that true?” “Didn’t he have the medical insurance?” “Why did he do so?” Though I don’t think it is right for him to do so, I can understand him. He wanted to be a true man, he wanted to keep all the troubles, all the difficulties to himself. He thought too much for others to make the right decision. Though he had the medical insurance, he himself must pay about 20,000 yuan. 20,000yuan is not a large amount of money to many people. But to him, it did be so. They
lived a hard life. Once two of my colleagues went to his home at noon, they knew
his life was a bit hard. So they took some dishes to his home. To their surprise, he and his son just had noodles in soy soup for lunch, without even vegetables. He kept it a secret, because he didn’t want his wife and his son to worry about him. He kept it a secret, because he didn’t want his wife and his son to live a harder life. He kept it a secret to the colleagues because he didn’t want
them to feel pity for him. He kept it a secret to the leaders of the school, because he didn’t want them to reduce his work so that he will get less money. (As
a teacher of Grade Three, he could be over paid for some extra classes. But he
is really a good teacher, and a standard party member. If he tried, he could persuade some of his students to study in his home, so that he could get much much
more money, but he never did so.)
He was wrong! He was completely wrong, though their family worried less about him when he was alive. But he left his family much more sorry and sadness. Though he spent less money in hospital, but we would rather that the money we donated could make him live longer than just seems a waste of money. And what’s more
, how much happiness he could give his family and how much money he could earn if he went to hospital to take the operation in March.
He is a good man, but I can’t say he is a great man. He thought too much about
others, so he seemed to be a bit selfish. He had left, leaving the sad wife and
the sad son. Fortunately, the end of the story was not so sad that maybe he will
feel a bit happy in another world. The colleagues of him and even his wife donated an amount of money may help him to pay back the money for the house. And an
extra insurance that the school paid for him may help him pay the medical treatment. His son can get 220 yuan from the government till he is 18. For their parents are farmers and have no definite income and too old, they can each get 220 yuan from the government every month as well, till they pass away.
Anyhow, all those who know him would rather he is still alive.
Wish you good luck in another world, my dear comrade.
And the last word I want to say is: Be a true man, be good to yourself.
