It was Saturday. My granny on my mother's side died yesterday. My parents had to go to countryside to deal with the funeral. They asked my younger brother to go out of his way to take care of me. As a young man at age 22, he still liked hanging around, like a big boy. Through so many years of strict restriction Parents put on him, this would be a perfect opportunity for him to let up a little. After several calls from his friends inviting him out, he became irritated and unable to sit down for a single moment. He looked at me imploringly. I sighed and remembered I'd also been though those days as he was experiencing now. Finally I granted his request for playing mah-jong all night long.
My inveterate personality and some special equipment had helped me get used to taking care of myself, such as going to bed and rest-room. Even without my brother, I was able to arrange and deal with every thing, including doing some simple family chores. This was a reason that caused him absent-minded at home.
After easily getting my permission, he was thrilled. He joyously made a caldron of rice porridge and fried an egg as a night snack. He rushed to a drugstore to buy instant soymilk and bread as my breakfast tomorrow. Then, in high spirit he dashed out to have his all-night mah-jong with his friends.
Well, it was nine o'clock in the evening, time for working online. My job as a master is to timely reply articles written by forum members and to issue "Best" to good ones in which contained hot topics for people to discuss.
Through discussions people learn something beneficial and strengthen their writing skills. Many people dream of being good writers after all! Sometimes, people would play some well-meaning jokes. We humorously mocked at some murk things going on all around the world. We need laughter to pour out our disappointment of darkness in the society. Maybe that's a kind of releasing emotions, or of enjoyment online.
Articles on the forum are often called posts. The first post I saw on my forum was written by someone who needed consultation about some law problems. I knew little about law, so I suggested him that the people in forums related to the law might help him.
You'll receive many replies when you politely and properly ask for help. Helping others seems much more easier to be done on the net than is it in reality where good deeds are hardly to be seen. That made me feel the brightness of life and excited about, even though every thing is virtual.
I moved on to another post written by a man, in which he recounted his troubles. Helped by his father-in-law he had a job with high salary. As a father and a husband, he led a substance-full life, but his wife was superior in every aspect of life and very mean to him. He felt stressful and no fun being a man. It was not until he met a girl who came in this city to work did he realize what was love. He decided to rent a house and live with her secretly, but he did not know what the future would bring to them.
After pondering for about ten minutes, I began to write him a reply quoted as follows.
"True love means tolerance and understanding to each other. Only in this way could the two worlds brought by each side come to turn into one world that the couple gradually learn to grasp the meaning of life.
If you've got an apple and trade it with the other, you will only get one apple. Thoughts, however, are something we share, not trade. Now you have a new thought, accordingly, you must share it with your wife.A real man is who has the sense of responsibility and of obligation, who has the faithful love to his wife and to his family. Not only is faithfulness showed through the time when a big decision comes but through the time when the decision goes.
If you really think the girl loves you, why not say to her that she will lead a poor life, perhaps even unable to pay the rent. Look at her attentively to see how she reacts to those words and see if she's still willing to be with you. As a father, you may also think about how to avoid hurting an innocent heart of your young child.
God bless you! Wish you a peaceful mind to get out of the confusion and to get back on the right track again!"
I stared into space a few minutes after finishing the reply. I had no idea whether what I wrote was reasonable and useful. Only did I know that I was trying my best to help a family re-bond together as did it before. Suddenly, the word "help" raced through my mind. Looking at the pants, inside empty, I smiled a bitter smile. Was there power and capability left for me to help others? It really seemed that I deserved more help than any other!
Turning attention back to the forum, I found two groups of member arguing over a hot topic "Should we encourage net-love?" It seemed the opponents were going to win over people. Presently, a friend found me on the online-member list and wrote a reply, "Why not see what our hostess has to say?"
In net-friends' eye Masters are of good reputation and charisma, which boosted up my self-esteem that had passed away since that accident. I would feel hopeless to do anything if I was away from the Internet. Now someone asked me do to something. I didn't refuse it, though it was one of the most sophisticated problems that puzzled many netizens.
Very shortly after I typed my viewpoint, a sentence "I approve of net-love," question marks and exclamation marks and "Whys" inundated the forum. I was not surprised at all that the friends were so surprised at my answer, written by a girl for most of the time expressing conservative thoughts and doing the way people in the old days did.
I continued to type my reasons for the approval as follows.
Take the example of a popular book every one knows entitled "The First Close Contact", written by Ruffian Cai. If it weren't for the heroine, known as Flying Dance who had the fatal disease lupus, chatting with the hero Ruffian Cai on the Net with her heart involved, she wouldn't have had the last days spent with him and the story wouldn't have been able to move readers' heart. If it happened in reality, the terrible lupus would probably scare Cai away before he could steal her heart. To say nothing of love!
Flying Dance lived out her last days happily, for she had enjoyed the real love via the Internet. She had gone to Heaven with nothing regrettable left, for she had really loved and treasured the most beautiful moments in her life. All she left were the love and wishes for Cai. How could this all happened without the Internet? I stopped typing, as I felt something wet on my keyboard. Tears in my eyes I remembered my boyfriend who left me after he was told my legs had to be removed. I used to hate him more than anyone and anything else. What is the promise for? For nothing when it comes to the cruel reality! However, I stopped hating him after I finally got it through. I started pondering what I would do if I knew I was going to spend my lifetime with someone who was a burden.
Human beings are something of the advanced animals that own the sense of responsibility. If the truth is that you cannot do something you aren't willing to, then stop doing it. Don't force yourself to do it. Be genuine and break up with the other at the very first beginning. Only in this way you will not hurt her so much that heartbreak kills her.
With teary eyes I looked at the screen and continued writing.
Why in the world is net-love not good for us? People suffering in real life have found comfort on the Net. More often than not there is a wild span between one's dream and the reality he has to face. We find such great examples in popular novels in Hong Kong and Taiwan, which plots are of wealthy young men loving poor "Cinderellas", of rich girls loving young men who are in the lowest social ladder, always of strong handsome men and elegantly pretty women. We of course know all of these can't be real in reality. Such beautiful love will be ruined by lay conception shortly after it starts. Despite the fact that the stories are made up, many people still love to read them. Probably they only want to comfort themselves for their unrealized dreams.
On the Internet there is no border and difference between areas. Timely communications, security, and privacy are the qualities of the Net. People can be more open to others without second thought. Their emotions are also more easily poured out. Two hearts come closer. Gradually love is taken out. In other words, "Cinderellas" and poor men who dare not to grab opportunities to love in reality will probably find their love in this virtual world.
However, because of the speciality of the virtual, net-love is a part of virtual life. It can't be tested by reality. The big difference between the real and the virtual will eventually bring you to devastation of your ideal imagination. So my approval of net-love is based on the thought that is not combined with the real life.
I tried hard to suppress my emotions. When the love and the car accident fell me behind, should I make the most of the Net to find love again? Deceitful though as it might be, it would be wonderful to get comfort from it! But what would it be if I told the other I was physically challenged? Could I lose even that love? Here an old Chinese saying goes, "Do not care how long it will last; only care about what you once had." Could I find any possibility to "have it" in all my life? Could it turn out to be "your business to do anything on the Net and your fault to jump out from it to scare people?" Depression came over me. I even started my jealousy of Flying Dance!
