Dear Santy,
Your story was quite well-translated and held my interest. The end was a surprise. I would like to reply to your comments:
Santy: "though many young girls, including some feminists nowadays tend to despise or hate or neglect the existence of the so-called "virgin complex", and regard their attitude as a more advanced feminine emancipation and a plausible claim for an equal status with men...."
Mary: This was the attitude here about twenty years ago. Women were equals because they could also sleep around now. I think it is not an argument that holds water. Why not reverse it? Males now should should remain virgins too, so that they can learn together with their new wives how to love each other. This would have a lot of effect on satisfaction in marriage and strong bonding together.
Santy: "I reserve my right to disagree in some ways...." First, I believe chastity is a union of body and soul. Second, virginity is not simply a physiological matter, as many people think, but more of a psychological and emotional matter. Whether you agree or not, a girl cannot have the same feeling on her second or third boyfriend as she had on her first if sex involved from the beginning, no matter how much they may love her, and this can be a great loss to the successors."
Mary: I completely agree with you except that I believe the above applies to both men and women and should equally be written:
"A man cannot have the same feeling on his second or third girlfriend as he had on his first if sex is involved from the beginning, no matter how much they may love him, and this can be a great loss to the successors."
Just because it has always been the practise through time that females should be chaste, and males are encourageda to "sow their wild oats" (in which females?) why should this not change in our more enlightened times so that both will save themselves for each other?
Think of all the advantages this would have! Learning and bonding together. Having something special between them that they have had with no one else. Mutual trust because the self restraint before marriage has proven the ability to be faithful in marriage. No possible sexually transmitted disease to cope with or pass on to the beloved. Sureness that one's children are one's own on the part of the male.
The reason men have always wanted virgins was to assure the paternity of the first child. Especially of the son and heir.
I know that older men in families have often encouraged or even introduced their young male relatives to women who would give them their first sexual experiences. Often enough these were prostitutes. Imagine turning a young man over to an experienced prostitute! Young men are often very noble-minded and idealistic about women. Why not leave that beautiful thing alone in them, to be turned belong to their future wives?
The fact is that youths today don't really need prostitutes because there are so many silly and willing girls they can practise on. Girls who think they are being "equal."
Wherever there are young men in groups the older ones want to see that they get initiated into sex. On ships. In the armed forces. It is a great pity that the father of Sir Winston Churchill got syphilis in just such a way, and died insane. I read about it in the life of Lady Randolph Churchill. It also apparently happened to Prince Charles through his Mountbatten uncle. Why do these sophisticated and debauched men think that they should make their young nephews or sons or fellow sailors, etc., into sexually experienced men? Do they get a kick out of the idea? Or what?
It is time that there was equality in opportunities, rights and privileges between men and women. That means that they should be equal in purity and chastity when they offer themselves to each other in marriage. Wouldn't that be a great change? Marriage would be sacred again. What on earth makes a man think that he is more of a man if he knows all about all the tricks needed to deflower his virgin wife? What makes him think that she wants that? Yet that is supposedly the idea behind it all.
Santy: "Third, as the saying goes, love is selfish. What would you think if you find out your beloved girlfriend or wife is not a virgin and whose body has been appreciated and played and occupied by some other guy, or guys? Not every male can declare: "I don't care."
Mary: "I agree with you again, Santy, except that it should be, as the lawyers say "mutatis mutandis". Although only females were mentioned by you, what you wrote was intended to apply equally to males. That is as it should be.
Dear Santy, I look forward to more of your translations. :-) You opened what should be a controversial topic. I am convinced of my own point, but I really wonder how many of you will agree with me. Even though it would be such a great advantage to marriages and families and health of both and their children.
Warmly, Mary
