I only remember to come back to visit hong en when a friend reminded me that he has post some poem in this webby. yes, it has been, almost 4 months, compare to the previous articles i posted in this site.
how's everyone.
how have i been so faR? well, i have changed a job..no longer bitter at job i suppose? at least, i thought i am happy. yes, switching from american fast moving consumer goods company to french pharmaceuticals.
what's on top of everything is that, company not only subsidize me for my parking, but also, subsidize me to learn french as i would have to liase with the rest of the region and to liase with head quarter in Paris for all the consolidation work and distribution of information, and of course, being the regional office staff, have to offer "support" if countries representatives were to ask from us..lest forget to mention my increment in the current company is 1/3 compare to what i obtained from the previous company. let's do a bit of a calculation here shall we? factoring all the course fee, bonus, benefits, parking subsidy that i am getting, i obain as much as 30Ks per year, which, i think, would be a relatively significant amount of pay as compare to my fella ex classmates.
i grow, the way i managed to land my ass in the present company. the best part i suppose, is being a staff in the regional office, you'd get exposure to different cultures different countries, different circumstances and different stories. and it is undeniable that, sometimes, when help was expected at serveral level at the same time or when there are concurrent projects, it requires a significant amount of concentration and speed in completing task + patience. i shouldered more responsibilities here than i can ever imagined as compare to the previous company, which, in turn, gives me addtional pressure as i have been expecting myself to perform, and the last i would expect is that disappointment or complaint from my boss.
apparently, it started happening lately. i wasnt sure what is going on. perhaps it is the fact that i had, infact been, bitting more than what i can chew. i took up all sort of analysis work, on top of different assignments that my boss has already assigned me, and i volunteered myself for the french course, not to mention i need to finish reading some accounting text and conduct classes for fella colleagues, which, in turn, i suppose to spend at least 3 hours a day to prepare for my professional chartership exam.
what was i thinking when i sign up for all this, gradually? am i trying to commit suicide? or did i infact try pushing my luck further n further testing the limit that i could ever reach?
i treasure the time and fun i have working along with my boss. can you imagine the fact that he has not much working experience, he is only 26 but he is the regional budget controller for the entire region for about 12 countries? perhaps it was the fact that we do not have much of a age gap, we got a long so well that sometimes i mistakenly take him as my siblings or my friend instead of my supervisor.
however, bizarely, i had a fight with him last nite. i was not surprise to see that coming as both of us are very firm believer of our own opinions. and we are both very stuborn. nonetheless, i do not foresee nor am i happy with the fight we had. we didnt even quarrel, i gave him the silent treatment when he asked me to removed some of the designs in my project. of course i am not happy about it given what i have already been facing and why isnt this being mentioned during the very initial stage of the design of the project? not to mention the great pressure i already had with so much pending task piling up day by day on my desk and so much ad hoc projects that i got involved in, so many emails to be replied and so little time left for the analysis part of the job.
not to mention that my intention to leave work sharp at 6pm and my schedule for chartership exam preparation has been ruin due to the fact that we need to have constant discussions n meetings every now and then. i cant help to think that why am i doing to be a pioneer in the company? and where do i stand 1 or even 3 years down the track?to makes things even worse, the more devoting i am into studying and preparing for my exam, i realise that my current job scope is millions yard far from the working experience that the exam board is demanding from its candidates. in other words, even if i were to successfully finish passing all three stages of exam in 3 years, it still does not qualify me to obtain the chartership.
to be totally honest,i forego interview invitations from some world known giant companies. it is not due to the fact of all those benefits that my company is currently offering me, it is more of..the very existence of my boss, as i have this stuborn belief that i would never encounter someone that i can click along with as well as i am with him. but then again, despite the fact i turned down all those interview invitations, it doesnt mean that i am ready to forego my chartership! of course i wont want the board to tell me, sorry mdm, despite the excellent achievement, we can offer u the chartership due to the mere fact that u are lack of actual working experience. but i have so much fear n so clear that i am not ready to leave this company at all, not to mention my boss!
what should i do?
it is no longer as simple as when we were in school, u take this answer, if it is wrong, ur lecturer will tell u off and warn u for the consequence. now it is a matter of life and career path that we are choosing.
******************************************************************************
one year anniversay part..to be continued..
