What do our kids need most?
I was so shocked, totally speechless after I finished the story of a boy on today’s newspaper.
The boy had just finished the college entrance examination and was waiting for his test results. For days and nights right after the test, he went out on a spree with his classmates and friends during the daytime and spent the nights watching the Euro 2004 football match. He was exhausted but he was totally unaware of it. This lasted for several days and last night he again stayed up late and while he was watching TV, he suddenly let out a cry and fainted. Only a few minutes after he was sent to hospital by his worried parents, he died. With all his dreams for the future. He died, leaving his heartbroken parents and grandparents behind, all their hope dead with their only child.
Those of us who once sat this utmost important test for all students know how it feels. The strenuous study and the intense preparation before the test, the nervous waiting after it, and the feeling that finally all is over. Our kids are so overloaded. Their schools, their teachers, their families and the society are all pressing them to perform better in the test, to study harder for a higher score. But is that all education about? We forget education is a means rather than the end. We educate our kids so that they can live a better, a happier, and a healthier life. That is the end. Mental health education is almost ignored, physical training is usually belittled, ethics cultivation willingly delayed, aesthetics development unwillingly forgot.All those vitally important things for a healthier life have to give way to bookish knowledge and higher scores. I am not arguing that higher scores are completely meaningless, but is that all our kids need?
The kids nowadays surely have better living conditions. We think we are taking very good care of our children when we give them good food to eat, good clothes to put on, good pocket money to spend, and good tutors to give them extra homework to do. We willingly pay for all those things, believe that we are being qualified parents and that is all they will need. We forget that they will deal with the society and various pressures from life and study and work and what they badly need is a healthy mentality and a sound personality.
Sadly, I thought of my 9-year-old daughter. She is in Grade 2 in her primary school now. But the shadow of test is already cast on her small life and world. She took her final-term examination last week and today they will go to school for the results. After breakfast I surprisingly found she was wearing a pair of bright red cotton socks that I bought for last new year’s day. When I told her they were too hot and thick for summer days, she seriously answered me, “ You once told me red color will bring us good luck, I hope I can get a good score today. I don’t mind being a little too hot.” Her seriousness so achingly touched my heartstrings. Have I ever pressed her so much? Am I giving her the impression that a higher score is more important than all the other things, even than her health and happiness?
Well, I got to think more about what I say and do to my girl.
